Sunday, September 27, 2009

Game Over.

God...

Josh is leaving me. He's doesn't want to be roommates anymore. He's finding another apartment. It's all over. I fucked up a million times over and this is killing me. He's killed me. I've killed me.

I tried talking to him. I told him about the crush. I told him what i did was wrong and I'd take it back a thousand times but he's made up his mind. What has been done was done in his eyes. I can't believe this is happening. Please wake me up from this nightmare. I don't have the energy to post right now, and I don't think I will for a while.


Happy fucking birthday.

13 comments:

  1. Shane

    I so sorry this went this way. I always feared days like this and well i guess its wh ihavent otld anyone. It maybe be getting better for us but how can it be when days like this occur

    Stay strong and life will get better.

    take care and be safe

    bob

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shane - I'm sorry things turned out this way ... try to hang in there and reach out if you need anybody to unload on

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am sad to say that I know exactly what you feel like. It's a terrible place to be, but I assure you that it gets better.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm so sorry to hear that it came to this. I think he's being immature in the way he's handling this situation. If he's truly your friend, he'll soon realize just how much this friendship means to you and how badly you've been hurt.

    All things pass, even this. The worst of times, just like the best of times, come to an end. We're all here for you when you wake from this nightmare. We're here to talk if you ever need us for support. You're stronger than you know - everyone is. Just don't give up.

    *Hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  5. I too am sorry to here that it has come to this. I know to well how you are feeling. But remember this...,

    "Night is always darkest, before the dawn."

    Is he severing all ties, or just moving out? Maybe he needs to just clear his head, afterall that was a big bomb you just dropped on him.

    Don't do anything drastic mate, if you need to chat to someone, I am here-> commodoreoctavius@live.com msn & email.

    Courage and Honour!

    Octavius.

    ReplyDelete
  6. By the way..., Happy birthday!

    Octavius.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm really sorry Shane.
    Things will get better.

    ReplyDelete
  8. That must really hurt, and it probably will for some time. But as others have said, over time the pain will diminish. Meanwhile, all you can do is hang in there.

    If you're very lucky, he may renew the friendship after he cools down, but you can't really move him in that direction, because if you initiate contact before he's ready, he'll just pull away more. So you have to leave him alone. Maybe a Christmas card, but nothing before that. Unless he makes a move, you'll just have to accept that he's out of your life. This is very painful, and I'm sorry to write it. But I think it's the best way forward for you. As I say, it hurts terribly right now, but it won't always.

    *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  9. One more thing. Don't blame yourself too much. If this wasn't bound to happen sooner or later, it was highly likely. Living in such close contact with someone you feel so strongly attracted to puts great emotional pressure on you (or anybody in that situation). It would have taken a rare degree of heroic self-control not to have some slip-up sooner or later.

    Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Well if this is rock bottom, then surely it should only get better from here on. Stay strong anyway buddy and you'll get through it..

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sorry to hear that, hang in there and push yourself through, you might just have to left things go and move on, difficult as that sounds, and perhaps yes one day he will come back around.

    *HUGS* and Happy Birthday?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sorry to hear that man! Sounds like naturegesetz has some good advice. :::Hug:::

    ReplyDelete
  13. oh man. i'm so sorry Josh has reacted this way.

    i totally agree with what NG said and i just hope some of your former friendship can be salvaged and that your professional relationship with him will still work.

    i won't wish you a happy birthday as it seems a bit pointless now, but i will say i really hope that your next year improves vastly from where you are now.

    hugs
    torchy!

    ReplyDelete