A Tragic Dream

Last night I was bored out of my mind. I was starting to get worried though, since I was feeling a strong bought of depression coming on, one that I hadn't experienced since close to 4 years ago when one of my friends died. This time it was because I was feeling alone. But don't worry, I'm stronger than most in the same situation, and I promise I will seek help before I even think of anything stupid.

I had a dream last night too, and I didn't even remember that i had a dream until mid-day at work it just flashed in my memory, so I quickly wrote it down and hid the paper in my pocket. The dream was very nice, yet dark and tragic. This is what I could remember:

A kid, maybe 16 years old contacted me because he really liked me. I can't remember how he found me or contacted me, but I might guess facebook. He had a very boyish face, and medium-long brown hair. He seemed like he came from the lower to middle class, from the way he dressed, but honestly I can't remember that much detail. Later, he randomly finds me at a gathering, maybe it was a party. The entire dream took place at night, so it was naturally dark. The place we met was damp and wooden, almost like it was on a gigantic old-fashioned ship or a large, dark, wooden house overlooking a body of water. I was very happy to see him.

The next day though, I find him dead. I was at the bottom of the body of water, and I found a body, and I pulled it closer and I saw his face and the skin on his stomach was gone, and I couldn't take it. I let go quickly. I was devastated.

I find out in the dream, that he was killed because a group, maybe a government agency I don't know, thought that he was carrying a child in him, so that is why the skin on his stomach was missing.

Here is my analysis of the dream:

- I kind of doubt it, but the group that killed him might happened because of District 9. Kind of spoiler, but not really: the main character is hunted because unnatural things are happening to him, and so his body is very valuable.

- The fact that he contacted me like that might have happened because I have been thinking about and communicating on a dating site.

- He was younger because I have a tendency to want to be a role-model to people.

- I think he tragically died in the end because he resembles all of my friends that I have met in life, have either moved away from me, or I left behind when I moved here. Also, because I was feeling lonely and depressed that night.

- The fact that they thought he was bearing a child: might have to do with me thinking about gay relationships and that they can never have a child like a straight couple can.


I love dreams, the good, and the tragic.

Delusional

Josh's gf is up for the weekend... bleh. I guess that makes me the third wheel and just another reminder of how lonely I am. The good news is she won't be up for a while after this because she'll be starting school at the end of August.

I made chili for the three of us and spent the night playing CoD4, although I'm not having any fun with it with a raincloud over me.

Last night after I went to bed my phone buzzed. I checked it and it said 'Message 1 sent.' I was confused so I checked to see what my phone decided to send on its own and it was a text I tried to send to Josh last Thursday while I was in line at the DMV, but since I didn't have reception, it stored it to try again later. It said 'Longest line everrr.' and Josh replied last night 'For??' and I just returned it with laughter at how retarded my phone was for doing that.

I think I'll take a hot bubble bath for something to do and I might be on MSN in an hour or so.

Here are 5 questionably interesting facts or thoughts:

- I'm taking the weekend off from running.
- My favorite soft drink has been root beer for quite a long time.
- It's been raining and gloomy all day... hell, half of summer.
- I bought a bottle of ginger beer and pinapple soda two nights ago and have yet to try them.
- My black and white Puma's were getting worn down and dirty so I went to the shoe store and bought the same exact pair. I honestly couldn't find a pair I liked better than them.